All parents make mistakes from time to time. But even if it happens often enough, it doesn’t make you a bad parent. Every mistake gives you the opportunity to develop your skills in raising children and learn important life lessons.
The Internet helps parents discuss their failures
With the advent of the Internet, parents have become more open to discussing failures in raising children. They share more funny stories that happen to them. But the discussion of serious and deep issues related to the upbringing of children, receded into the background.
It’s good that parents can share stories and treat failures with humor. But not all discussions on the Internet take place in such a carefree way. Failures in raising a child have become a serious problem for parents these days.
Parents are ashamed of the condemnation of others
Unfortunately, people try to express their opinion even in cases when it is completely inappropriate. They often resort to evaluative judgments and shape public opinion. And it’s not just about casual Internet users who have read the story and decided to embarrass their parents.
Parents are afraid to look bad in the eyes of those around them
Because of condemnation, many parents are afraid to look bad, even if they do nothing wrong. This leads to even bigger problems.
The fear of looking like a bad parent has the following consequences:
- Parents do not allow children to make mistakes. They are concerned that the child may forget things while going to sports or school, do homework incorrectly and thus will look bad in the eyes of others. Therefore, they support the child, save him from any trouble, thus depriving him of the opportunity to learn a valuable life lesson.
- Parents hide their mistakes. Nobody wants to be criticized. Therefore, to avoid critical remarks and unwanted advice, some parents carefully hide their failures in education. Disclosure of these facts is a shame, so problems are often ignored.
- Parents forget about their values. Some parents, trying not to look bad, change their parenting habits. They succumb to the whims and tantrums of the child, so as not to look bad in the eyes of those around them. Or they are so obsessed with creating the image of the ideal family on social networks that they do not work on solving real problems.
How to learn a life lesson from failures in education
Parental mistakes are inevitable, whether you lose your temper and frustrate your child, or set a bad example. But each such case carries a life lesson. You can learn it by following these tips:
- Admit your mistake. Before you correct a mistake, admit it, at least for yourself.
- Allow the mistake to be a lesson to you. If your mistake hurts your child, apologize. Show her an example of responsibility for your actions and what you will not do in the future.
- Treat mistakes with humor. If you share funny and harmless cases from your own experience, you are easier to deal with your own parental mistakes. In addition, you will be able to communicate with other parents who will understand you. So share your stories.
- If necessary, contact support. Communicate with other parents who are willing to discuss difficult problems and mistakes in parenting. Do not be afraid to seek professional help if you find it difficult to cope with the situation.
- Think about what is best to do in a similar situation next time. Whether you succumb to your child’s whims or shout at them unnecessarily, come up with a plan to help you become a more effective parent.
Raising a child is not perfect
The only thing we can say about raising children is that from time to time we will fail. But even if you were the perfect parent, it still wouldn’t give your child any benefits.
When a child is raised by imperfect parents, he can learn to get along with an imperfect roommate, be in a relationship with an imperfect partner, and work in a team with imperfect employees. Learning to live with people is a very important skill for a child.
This does not mean that you have to specifically show your bad traits to teach her to live with people. This means that you can take responsibility for your mistakes.
In turn, you can show your child an example of how their own mistakes can be a lesson in how to improve the situation and draw conclusions for themselves.