12 tips on how to develop a child confidence
"I'm afraid I won't pass the exam," "I don't think I'll be accepted into the school team," "I'm not sure I can play the guitar as well as my dad." Have you ever heard this or that from your child? If your answer is yes, then your child lacks confidence.
What you do or don't do; words you say or don't say to your child; the feelings you express or hide - all this affects the formation of her self-confidence. To develop a child's confidence, you must treat it properly.
Consider how you can act to help this child.
- Love and acceptance
Without a doubt, you love your child no matter what. But does the child know about it? Does she realize that you love her, accept her and respect her choice?
Show love to your child, even if you are not always able to do so. The child must know that he is loved and accepted, regardless of its advantages and disadvantages. Unconditional love is the basis for a child to grow up to be a confident person.
The main thing is to respect your child as a person.
- Emphasize the advantages, correct the disadvantages
No one is perfect, and children are no exception. But to raise a child confident, you should not focus on its shortcomings.
The upbringing of children should be aimed at developing the strengths of their character. Thus the child should feel capable to develop and carry out various tasks. Otherwise (for example, a child does poorly in school, fails in sports, etc.), help him realize his strengths. Tell her how strong she is.
This does not mean that you should not pay attention to your child's mistakes. Inspire her to learn from her mistakes, but pay special attention to her achievements. This will remind the child that he can succeed if he wants to.
- Do not rush to help the child at the first difficulties
Parents tend to protect their children and do everything possible so that they do not feel the bitterness of defeat, disappointment or pain. But rushing to the child's aid whenever she faces the slightest problem is a bad idea. You can give her this or that help, but the child must solve their own problems on their own.
- Allow the child to make decisions
Decision making is an important life skill that a child must master in order to become self-confident. Decision-making inspires the child, because he sees different opportunities, can choose what suits him best. But until maturity has come, the child does not always know how to make a choice.
To help your child learn to make decisions, first give them two options to choose from. For example, you can ask your six-year-old daughter to decide what to wear to school (within reason, of course). At the same time, explain to her that she cannot choose whether to go to school or not.
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By allowing your child to make healthy choices (such as what to wear, what movie to watch, etc.), you are also teaching them to take responsibility for their decisions.
- Encourage and develop your child's talents
Many children have special interests. Some like music or dancing, others naturally draw well. Identify your child's talent and develop their abilities. If your child likes to draw, enroll him in art school. If she likes a certain sport - give it to the sports section.
The development of a child's inclinations and talents perfectly helps to strengthen his self-confidence.
- Give the child responsibility
One of the most effective ways to build a child's self-confidence is to give them small tasks that they can do. The realization that she can do something on her own can pleasantly surprise a child. When we easily perform a task without experiencing difficulties, our brain is "charged" and ready to perform new tasks. Therefore, it is best to entrust the child with simple household chores. Don't forget to praise her when she does the job well.
For example, an eight-year-old child can be instructed to feed a dog every morning. When a child does this without a reminder, praise him.
- Praise the child when he deserves it
When a child does something wrong, parents often reprimand him. But it is equally important to praise her when she does everything right. However, parents often forget about it. Of course, you should not praise a child for every little thing, but if she made an effort and coped with the task or does something right for a long time, praise her.
For example, if a child feeds a dog for several weeks without reminders, evaluate its efforts. Even a simple "good guy" will strengthen her self-confidence.
- Teach your child positive self-suggestion
Self-suggestion is an internal dialogue with oneself. What we say to ourselves every minute has a significant effect on our self-esteem and self-confidence. Our thoughts affect our emotions and potential success. Therefore, if a child believes that he can cope with any business, his chances of success increase significantly.
By convincing themselves with positive thoughts, young children learn to control themselves and achieve success in life.
- Set realistic goals for your child
The best way to make a child doubt his or her own abilities is to give him or her tasks that he or she will not be able to complete. But if you want your child to be successful, healthy and confident, set realistic age goals.
For example, if you want your child to learn to play the piano, this is a very real goal. But it is unrealistic to expect her to learn to play for a month. In this case, it is better to set short-term goals for the child: to study the notes, learn to play simple melodies, and so on. But if you want your child to win a music competition in a month, you will set him up for failure and frustration, not self-confidence.
- Allow the child to accept his own defeats
No matter how hard you try, you will not be able to save your child from failure. Like all people, your child will be defeated, hurt and frustrated from time to time. And this is normal. In such cases, it is not enough to simply tell the child: "Do not sniff" or "Do not take close to heart."
Teach your child to be emotionally flexible and to accept victories and defeats calmly. Tell her that sometimes it's okay to fail, and next time she can get what she wants if she tries.
The child is able to learn from their mistakes and correct them next time. It is important to explain to her that failure is natural, and after them you can always find a way to succeed.
- Set a positive example to follow
Are you not sure about yourself? Do you doubt your own abilities? If so, should your child be expected to grow up confident?
Give advice to your own problems with self-esteem and self-confidence, set a positive example for the child to follow.
- Encourage the child to express feelings
A self-confident child can express his feelings without experiencing discomfort and without showing excessive emotion or aggression. Self-confidence is the ability to express feelings in a healthy way, as well as to know when to stay calm.
Encourage your child to express their feelings orally or in writing. Teach her to be calm in difficult situations. Explain to the child that you should not suppress your feelings, because they can manifest when they experience difficulties.
